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Quote of the Week

"The more spacious and larger our fundamental nature, the more bearable the pains in living."

-Wayne Muller (Author, Therapist, Minister) 🌼

This Week's "Subconscious Success" Tip

Today I'd like to share another concept from my Daoist studies that has helped me stretch my subconscious mind. Click here for last week's share about the "good/bad" paradigm.

Also btw - if you don't already know - Daoism (aka Taoism) is a way of living (also called a philosophy and religion by some) that emphasizes living in accordance to nature and the ways of the Dao.

So, let's explore "The Uncarved Block" ("Pu" in Chinese). This is a metaphor for the natural state of a being...something un-adorned and simple...something that has not yet been defined and is open to limitless possibilities.

If you take a block of wood and you carve it into something like a spoon, for example, it has now been "defined" and has very limited function.

It connects to the perspective I shared last week as well because the uncarved block state is one that comes before we learn the concepts of bad/good, wrong/right, beautiful/ugly, etc. It is also like the Dao itself - undefined and limitless.

(Note - this is a simplified contemplation and there is even deeper wisdom here)

How to Apply This Tip

I've been contemplating...how can I be like the "uncarved block"? So far, this has brought up a lot of stuff around my identity.

Here are the questions that might help you start exploring this concept:

• How do I define myself? What roles and societal labels have I taken on as part of my identity?

• What does it mean about me that I identify with these? For example, since I identify with being an organized person, then that means to me that I like things to be tidy - especially when I want to be creative or feel at peace.

• How might this be limiting? From the example above, I notice that when things are messy, I can get frustrated and can't really focus until things are cleaned up. If I hold on strongly to this identity, then it might be really challenging for me to be flexible in situations where I can't control the outcome of how clean things are, right? (and life presents us with quite a bit of situations like this, eh?). I also notice that I sometimes judge people who are messy, creating a certain degree of stress in my system.

• What type of experiences might become available to me if I was more flexible with how I identify? How would I feel on an average day?

• What does it mean to me to be at a "natural" state?

• What do I criticize in others or myself? What do I admire? (And similar questions from above can be applied here too)

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At the end of the day, this is an invitation to notice how qualities of yourself that you've identified with might be limiting - so that you can have an expanded, more fulfilling experience of life, regardless of your external circumstances.

There are also are some really cool exercises out there, like the Wholeness process from Connirae Andreas, that can help us release attachment to identity qualities, so we can experience much more flexibility and adaptability in our life's experience. This typically results in life feeling at least a little easier (not necessarily that life is easy because there are no challenges - but rather - our perception of those challenges changes which is HUGE!).

To me it's not about complete detachment or erasing anything...it's more about cultivating flexibility and expanding what I think is possible for me. As I do this, I can flow much more easier with life and not feel stuck.

Remember - as all Daoist perspectives, the wisdom within each runs deep and reveals itself with time. The invitation here is just to get you started if you choose to explore this.

Why this might matter to you (the short version)

Contemplating how the qualities that we identify with can limit us can be fascinating!

Think about it - how many times have you said to yourself or to someone - "I can't do ____ because I'm ______" or "I have to/need to/should do ____ because I'm _____"?

I'll tell you one from my life...in the past I've thought "I can't just wing things because I'm someone who needs to be prepared for everything." To a large degree, I still hold that as truth and as a result I've had a hell of a time speaking off the cuff when it comes to building my business or even joyfully saying "yes" to a spontaneous trip that's not already pre-planned.

Another one for me used to be "Since I'm an independent person, I can't ask for help without feeling shitty." That's been a fun one for me to expand also.

The point here is not to self shame or blame, but rather, just curiously expanding our perceptions of what's possible.

So many folks have "freedom" as one of their top values...perhaps to them it means financial, creative, or time freedom....but what about an internal sense of freedom?

Freedom to be who you want to be (in the moment and in different contexts)...freedom to decide to change your mind and do something different without the need to cling to the past...freedom to experience life from a wide range of perspectives. To me...this adds so much color and magic to life. What do you think?

Ready To Try It?

If this concept interests you, take some time either in journal or day dream form to contemplate the questions from this email.

Also, if you'd like to learn how to integrate these aspects of your identity so they can feel easier to expand and relax, and you can feel more flexible with who you really are, book a coaching session with me! I'd love to guide you through Wholeness or Core Transformation.

That's it! Have questions about this week's tip? Want to share something with me? Connect with me!

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Cheers to your success!

-Alina Nikishina

Transformational Coach & Mentor

P.S. What's one aspect of your identity that you've been exploring and expanding in your inner work journey?

Click here to connect and share with me! I love hearing about your journey.

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